the place where i go.

i will never be afraid again.
it steals things, you know. you know this.
i havent, yet, been where you were that night..
devastating...hopeless, dark things...hit so hard and heavy.

I pretend.
i pretend or very carefully introduce the idea that i can mask it. and detach from my social nature.
im easy, open and eager for them
am i just symptoms?
will they know, or have the perspective that i am crazy?
do they think im crazy JR?

the extreme chemical that "correct" that bad things.
they make stretching feelings in my reality.
the size of the universe used to infinitely terrify me.

but like my realization to allow bad days, as if we had a choice, to calmly happen and stay very far from feeling.       kind of like that.
because i dont want to be scared. i accept an idea that just like many human restrictions, our brain is only made and needed for what we need and encounter here. It, then, doenst seem so scary.

im not afraid and i know you arent either.
i am not cement still certain that i can overcome or prevent [it].

ive come to not take for granted, when the dark feelings happen, the absence of fear. 

because the worst has happened then.
and i will let it climax in horrible detail. not happy but stable.

I'm still not hurting about you. What is it like to be free?